First Week at Home in Pictures

Got milk?

One benefit to a week long stay in the NICU and an early start to pumping? Having over 100 ounces of milk in the freezer by the two week mark. This picture represents many nights out in my future (and less stress for me when Henry starts day care).

Side By Side

I'm starting to think Brian and I created the same kid twice. For your consideration, Oliver on the left and Henry on the right (both at two-ish weeks):

Two Week Wellness Visit

Ann and I took Henry in for his two week wellness visit yesterday. This is already his third visit to his pediatrician since he was discharged last Tuesday. He went once for a check up the day after he was discharged and then back for a weight check on Friday of last week to make sure he was putting on weight (and not still losing weight as had been the case).

Here are his two week stats:

Weight: 6 pounds, 4.8 ounces (5th percentile)
Height: 19 1/2 inches (10th percentile)

He's a tiny little peanut (such a change from his brother who always tipped the scales at around the 75th percentile and was over 9 pounds by the time he was two weeks old). Since his first check up with our pediatrician he has averaged a weight gain of one ounce a day. That is a good weight gain but the doctor says they really like to see babies back at their birth weight by the two week mark so his weight is still a concern. He's also still a little yellow from jaundice. So, although his next wellness visit technically shouldn't be until he's two months old (which will be on big brother's four-year birthday), Dr. Sharp would like to see him back in two weeks for another weight check and to make sure he's gotten rid of that yellow tinge to his skin.

Tuesdays With Henry - Week Two

Henry's second week was his first week at home (a fact that has me constantly trying to remember how old he is. That first week in the hospital is such a blur). Since he was in the NICU we didn't get to introduce him to as many friends and family members as we wanted to during his first week so this week was marked by lots and lots of visitors and it was great.

I don't want to jinx myself but, so far, Henry has proven to be a very laid back baby. He only cries when he's hungry (or occasionally when we change his diaper and he gets cold) and even when he's crying it doesn't last long. He's having more and more awake and alert periods every day. When I'm done feeding him he'll spend almost an hour just staring at me. It's awesome. He's not the best sleeper but he's not the worst. He sleeps for three hours in a row during the day and only two hours at night. But he doesn't struggle to go back to sleep at night (in fact, I can finish feeding him, swaddle him, and put him in his bassinet while he's still awake and he'll go to sleep. I'm wondering if this is due to his time in the NICU. He couldn't be rocked to sleep for that first week so maybe he got used to doing it himself?). The first couple of nights he was out of the NICU he struggled with the dark and the quiet and was up every hour or so but he seems to have gotten used to the fact that when we sleep at night at home that there aren't florescent lights shining in his eyes, nurses gabbing away, or monitors alarming every other minute. But he can still do his day naps through all sorts of distractions - music playing, dogs barking, Oliver being Oliver, etc.

He has also really come around on his eating. He's waking up hungry and chowing down like a champ. We kept the rented scale for a week to watch his intake and he's now getting over two ounces at each feeding which is perfect for his needs. I am still pumping to keep my supply up but we aren't supplementing with bottles anymore since he's filling himself up by nursing. This has all been quite a relief for me. I was terrified that since we didn't get started nursing until he was four days old, that it might not work out for us (so many birth and pregnancy books can really freak you out with their insistence that the baby needs to be put to the breast as soon as he pops out in order to establish a strong breastfeeding relationship) but we seem to have turned a corner and I'm hopeful that we will have a long and successful nursing relationship.

Here are the pictures from this week. I still haven't found a time to take these that he's willing to open his eyes. Maybe next week?

Oliver the Big Brother

Oliver has shown an equal measure of love towards and genuine disinterest in Henry since he got home. This has proven to be a perfect combination. Oliver will come home from school, check in on "Baby Henry" and then go off to do his own thing. He likes to help me out when I am nursing Henry (brings me water, etc.) and is really interested in the whole breast feeding thing (my favorite moment so far has been Oliver asking me: "Can I make milk out of mines (meaning his nipples), too?"). He tells Henry he loves him and asks to give him kisses but for the most part he leaves the baby alone.

He's only really be interested in holding Henry the first day he was home. So, we got him set up on the couch, put Henry is his arms, and took a few pictures. After a few minutes, Oliver looked at me and said: "I'm done. Can I have your iPad instead?"

We haven't really dealt with any jealousy issues yet. He seems to understand that when it's time for me to feed Henry, that I have to do it right then - that Henry can't wait. But we are dealing with the residual stress of what our lives have been like for the last three months. I knew that my hospital stays were difficult on Oliver but it's only been since I've been home that I realize how difficult. From time to time, he will say things like: "When you go back to the hospital, I will miss you." And I realize that he's not entirely confident that the difficulties are behind us. So, I'm trying to find ways of assuring him that I'm not going back to the hospital without making him any promises I can't keep and without making him think it was Henry's fault that I was there in the first place. This last piece has been especially difficult since it's hard not to say: "Now that the baby's out, I don't need to go back to the hospital." Every day he seems a little more confident that I'm here to stay.

A Thank You (Part One)

Post by Brian

It’s been documented here, we had a tough pregnancy, and there are a few things I wanted to say, and a few people I wanted to thank. This will take two parts. The second part is aimed at the countless helpers who softened our hardship, and the first part is aimed at one person.

I’ve never once worried about my wife. It sounds terrible to say, but anyone who knows her knows why. Elizabeth is the epitome of competence, she doesn’t need anyone to worry about her. It’s wasted energy, and she hates waste. She’s been asked to handle tough times in her life, and she’s handled them with something that resembles grace, but angrier. Over the past 4 months, she dealt with bleeding, bed rest, and the constant weight of having a small child in her belly that was having a very tough time. She didn’t blink. Everyday she got up, put one foot in front of the other, laughed, cried, yelled, and nurtured. She didn’t always do these things with a smile, but she always did them as Elizabeth. I simply can’t get enough of this woman. 

Most of you reading this know us, and you also know that I don’t tell Elizabeth how I feel on Facebook, or publicly at all. Most of the time we play the role of the self-deprecating, old married couple, poking at each other, making jokes at the other’s expense. We don’t take things too seriously. But driving to the hospital, watching Elizabeth unsuccessfully attempting to will Henry to kick her, knowing that things were bad, but not knowing how bad, I almost panicked. Then I remembered who I am married to, and a calm came over me. This is Elizabeth, after all, and whatever happens, we will do the things that need to be done. My wife later remarked how calm she thought I was, and she was right, but I’m not sure she ever knew why. 

She did all the things that needed to be done. After a few more blips on the radar, we are home with a new baby boy, and Elizabeth will be running Town Lake before we know it. We’ll forget the heaviness we felt over the past 4 months, and we’ll mostly remember when we acted with compassion and bravery. I’ll forget that I worried about Henry all the time, worried about Oliver all the time, worried about the house, the dogs, my job, car, waist line, book group, politics, college, and fantasy football, but I never worried about Elizabeth.

Thank you, Elizabeth. I love you.