Dumping the Pump

After battling for over eleven months, I managed to lose seven pounds in the past week. That’s right, I dumped the pump. As I said earlier, I was having so many problems in the past month pumping enough milk for Oliver each day. I was always coming up short and I was frustrated. And, then, last Friday afternoon, after I had spent twenty minutes pumping to try and get enough milk for Oliver on Monday, I dropped a two ounce bottle of breast milk, soaking my jeans and the floor of my office. I am very proud that I didn’t cry (I’d never dropped that much milk at once and I had certainly never been forced to wear spilled breast milk for hours) but I decided right then that I was done with the pump. After consulting with and being consoled by Laurie and Jessica, I went home and told Brian that the breast milk we had in the freezer was all the breast milk that Oliver was going to get without me around. I was determined not to pump again.

And, luckily for me, it’s worked out so far. I went to work Tuesday, Wednesday and today (I took Monday off to visit with Ben, Deonne and Will) without my pump. It was so awesome to leave that bag at home and to know that I wouldn’t spend twenty minutes cleaning pump parts when I got home. Due to my less than stellar supply as of late, I had no discomfort during the day. Brian and Oliver did great, too. We had enough milk for Oliver to get a bottle before his morning nap but not before his afternoon nap. So, Brian has learned to put him to bed without giving him a bottle and I have enjoyed a week free of the stress, frustration and annoyance that pumping had become. But we’ve only got one bag of milk left in the freezer so, starting next week, Oliver will not have any breast milk while I am at work. Strangely, even the past few days of being pump free have given me a second (or third or fourth) wind when it comes to nursing. It’s so freeing to know that I don’t have some milk quota to meet when I go to work and that I can still have all of the cuddly time of nursing when I get home. I might consider altering my weaning timetable... but, then again, I might not.