First Day of School Part One

Tomorrow is a big day in the Contine household. After over two years of staying home with Brian and over six weeks of staying home with whoever could watch him after Brian started working (huge THANKS to Laurie, my mom, and Ann, by the way), Oliver is finally starting day care tomorrow. We found  a school that we love (Open Door Preschool) and after almost two months of badgering them we secured a spot and a start date. I should be relieved. The last two weeks, I have been (almost) solely responsible for O’s care during the week on top of trying to do my full time job and I have done both tasks rather poorly. I should be excited to get back into a routine. To be able to do the same thing every day will be good not only for Oliver but for me. I miss being at the store and I miss being able to give my full attention to my work during the day.

I should be excited and instead I am a wreck. O is taking the news that he is going to school tomorrow in stride. He can tell me that in the morning he will pack Pete in his backpack and I will drive him to school. I will drop him off and he will play with his friends, eat lunch and take a nap there until I come to pick him up in the afternoon. And he knows that he will do that every day except Saturday and Sunday from here on out. He seems set and yet I know there will be tears in the morning. My tears, however, have already started.

I am mourning the end of O’s time at home with his dad (which, in reality, ended six weeks ago). I am mourning the end of the period of his life in which he spent every moment with one of his parents or grandparents. I know school will be great for him... that he will flourish in the new reality of not being the center of adult attention and that spending time with kids his own age will do him nothing but good. But still I’m sad and I’m anxious about our new routine.

I haven’t sat still at all today - filling my day with meaningless tasks trying to prepare us for tomorrow. I’ve done laundry, made stuff for lunches, packed and repacked Oliver’s backpack and yet I’m still not ready. I have so many questions about how this whole day care thing will work. Do I need to bring diapers? If so, how many? Can I just leave a stash at the school? What about wipes? What about nap time? Will he sleep? What could I send with him to make it more likely that he will? Will he like his teachers? His classmates? Ugh. I’m more nervous for O’s first day of school than he is. 

Here goes nothing.